Class and Designation Pt 2: "Neutered", or neutral spirits.

Let’s talk about class. I’ll be the teacher here, but this isn’t the grade school classroom. This is the class of spirits. In the previous post, I gently touched on touched on class being the big differentiator in spirits and today we’re going to get into what those classes are. This information comes from the code of federal regulation, or CFR, chapter 4, and there are 20 different types of classes. On this part we are going to look at neutral spirits and talk about what they really are and what they are not. Let’s get started with what the TTB says:

§5.22 The standards of identity.

Standards of identity for the several classes and types of distilled spirits set forth in this section shall be as follows (see also §5.35, class and type):

(a) Class 1; neutral spirits or alcohol. “Neutral spirits” or “alcohol” are distilled spirits produced from any material at or above 190° proof, and, if bottled, bottled at not less than 80° proof.

So what class 1 means is that you’ve made alcohol so potent that you could damn near put it in your lawnmower. It also means that it can be made from anything. You could make neutral spirits from any base product. You could make it from grain, from sugar, from fruit, etc. Hell, you could make it from Fruit Loops if you wanted too. Now lets delve into the different classes of Neutral Spirits.

Congratulations Mark McMillen!

Well this is possibly the greatest thing that could ever happen. There is finally someone filling the bottom shelf offering for Missouri Spirits! Truth be told, there wasn’t anyone that has been making thin mash that was priced accordingly. There has been a void on the bottom shelf for Missouri producers for quite some time and I think that it is really good that my former salesman is now making his own and peddling it all over SW Missouri. There are a lot of limited budgets that really don’t want to shell out their hard earned cash for a high end bottle of whisky and I understand that; some folks have different objectives when they crack open a bottle. I’m just glad that it is my neighbor and fellow veteran doing it. It’s a shame he didn’t tell me he was opening his doors. I would have loved to congratulated him in person.

Whisky, beards, and GNS

I had to take a break from packing so I decided to go to the Virginia Wine Expo in Richmond. For 60 bucks I got a free glass and was able to sample wine and spirits from over 70 producers. I was amazed. I was amazed by the turnout of both people and vendors there. I was also amazed by something else; the bullshit. 

Before I go any further, let me also explain that I have a two week rule before saying anything negative in a public forum. Yeah, I know that zero people subscribe to this blog, but I feel like a man should respond and not react. However, I'm not changing anything below the words "READ ON!. or above this paragraph. This is legit. I still feel like this company is trying to take credit for something that they don't give two fucks about. Yeah, this is the first time I've cussed on my blog but I mean it. These oxygen (and money) thieves are selling themselves as local guys but packaging a factory, button pushing, soul-less product. Kind of like the SOBs that run Clyde May's. Cylde Mays isn't even close to Alabama. They are L.A. (lower Alabama) or Florida. But that is another post that I'll save for later. READ ON

Before I start bashing on faux hipsters, let me point out what is "right" here in England's oldest colony. Virginia has some amazing wines. I seriously don't understand how California isn't going broke from a loss of interest in Virginia wines. I'm definitely not a wine aficionado but I have a pretty keen pallet. Everything that I tried that was "dirt to glass" Virginia was absolutely amazing. I come from Missouri, which is known throughout the wine industry for producing top notch Norton and Cynthia wine varieties. I've drank gallons of Norton/Cynthiana wines. I'm also ridiculously picky when it comes to alcohol; I've got a couple barrels of beer, maybe three barrels of wine (all for personal use), and a few thousand gallons of (documented) whisky sitting in my rickhouse at home so I don't ever need to buy anything.  I also know a lot of folks back home that make some pretty top notch wine and beer back home. One of which is a cattle farmer that probably the best Chambourcin in the country. However, I bought a bottle of Norton. It cost me all of 22 bucks and buddy, it was worth it. I digress though. Virginia has some amazing wines and it's worth the trip  to go and try some. Lets get back to our downtown craft distillers.

Let me explain. Among the hard working, salt of the earth, vineyard managers was one booth: Belle Isle. 

https://www.belleislecraftspirits.com

Standing behind their counter were two young bearded beaus and another guy that just had a cool hoodie and pointy sideburns; maybe he just wasn't sure about the commitment of a beard. Like whisky, it's a potentially multi year endeavor. Luckily for him, Belle Isle is just selling "moonshine". Again, I think that is another story. READ ON

These gents looked like young urban distillers. Maybe best friends that decided to break Virginia's liquor laws one day and make their own hooch. Perhaps they worked out an SBA loan, hocked their Vespa scooters, opened up a craft distillery in a run down garage and have been scraping to keep the doors open while they hone their craft and create an artisan product. Looks can be deceiving though. These aren't the owners, distillers, or anything even remotely related to craft spirits. They are just selling bottles. Belle Isle doesn't make anything. Here is what Belle Isle actually "does": they buy grain neutral spirits from an industrial distilling plant. What is an industrial distilling plant? Basically it's a factory. By the way, factories suck. I worked at one the first couple of years that Misty and I were married. It is a soul sucking, 12 hour shit (sorry, shift) of waiting to go home so you can get drunk off your ass and forget that you wasted that much oxygen pressing a button and making sure that a piece of wire wasn't 1 millimeter too long. So after they have got their industrialized craft moonshine, they do something magical: they put it in a bottle with their “magical brand” glued to the front, and peddle it to hard-working stiffs that don’t yet know enough to realize they have been duped.

This is the type of industry that you support when you buy a twenty dollar bottle of Virginia's Belle Isle Moonshine. Belle Isle basically takes the grain neutral spirits out of the Industrial Bulk Containers (IBC totes) filled with liquor that they didn't make, add Kool-Aide flavors, and put a pretty label on it. So what is grain neutral spirits? Grain neutral spirits, according to the TTB, is "Spirits distilled from any material at or above 95% alcohol by volume (190 proof), and if bottled, is bottled at not less than 40% alcohol by volume (80 proof)" Let me break this down for you. This means that you can't "taste the grain", or there is no similarity to the alcohol and the grain that it was made for. It's neutral. That rubbing alcohol that you have sitting underneath your bathroom sink is neutral spirits. The only difference is that it was treated, or "denatured" so that it would be undrinkable. Wait.... I guess there is another difference. Belle Isle uses organic corn. Cool. So do I. My neighbor four miles down the road raises organic corn too. He is a dirt poor farmer that uses heirloom corn seeds and can't afford to buy commercial pesticides. and because he works two jobs, (one at a chicken processing factory), doesn't have the damn time or patience to get a certification to label his 16 acres of corn as "organic". But let's get back to the glorious entrepreneurs at Belle Isle.

I waited about seven minutes for my turn to get to the counter and asked them about their craft, artisanal, and hand made products. Did they make it? Did they bet the farm on their dream of creating the best USDA certified, triple macchiato, gluten free, polar bear friendly moonshine ever known to mankind. Not only no, but hell no. No, and according to the bearded sample master, the owners, whoever they are, don't have any plans to start producing their own products. The tall, bearded blonde said that their business is "blossoming" and that they "have expanded into ten states" and that "sales are strong." All this company has is a name, a filling line, and hipsters with beards. Hey, as long as folks are buying the story I guess they will keep selling "Virginia Moonshine". 

*edit*

So I'm keeping true to my word. This is what I wrote one hour after visiting with the bearded drink pourers. In a way, I don't blame Belle Isle. It's just that on the way home, I called my wife. I sent her back home to Missouri while I packed the apartment up. I'm headed to S. Korea in 3 weeks and my orders say I'm going to be there for two years. Misty told me about how our youngest daughter finally decided to start talking and how our oldest (just turned 5) woke her up at 3 am. She was crying because she had a bad dream. She said that "daddy didn't love her anymore". I just think about my deployments, missing the first year of her life, how I've put my family into uncertainty, and about missing TWO years of my children's childhood. I'm sacrificing the most. valuable resource that I have so that I can take this tiny ass, backwoods distillery from a holler in the Ozarks to maybe a shelf in Los Angeles. It is just really painful when you realize the actual cost of it all and I guess that deep down I feel like Belle Isle is trying to cut in front of the line. I mean hell, Evan Williams is a family owned business that has been making Bourbon since Methuselah was in diapers. They don't talk about culture, heritage, technique, and skill; they are living it.  Evan Williams also makes one of my favorite bourbons in the world. I would prefer to see them than these bozos. Really, I have a bourbon collection that has it's own insurance policy; I'm not joking. I prefer Henry McKenna 10 year old, bottled in bond to some of the stuff that I have paid 900+ bucks for. Henry McKenna is just really old Evan Williams. Evan Williams paid their dues; they didn't sell out to a corporation headquartered in Japan, and they are making great bourbon the way they have always made it. That is the direction that I want to send White Mule Distillery. Lets walk the walk before we talk to talk. Fuck the hipsters. 

Letting the WHISKY age

I've been meaning to add a post for about two months, but I run on Ozark time so I reckon I'm just about on time. I'm headed to South Korea. I'll be there for two years and I ain't coming home until I play this game like a professional. I'm not sure, but I think this will be my last post for a real long time; just because I like to be honest and real honesty is hard. Soul-crushing hard. We lie everyday and it doesn't matter how you rank yourself on the piety scale. We lie and the person we lie to most is ourselves. Let me be honest with you though. The last year and a half has been the best, and hardest year since my last deployment. I realized the American dream; I opened my own business. I opened a business with my best friend. My best friend quit. My second daughter was born- on the day that I opened the distillery. I made a whole bunch of new friends. I barely made my mortgage payment. I did tastings at big events with my neighbor and good friend Mark. I damn near got bit by a copperhead (multiple times, seriously I have killed about 20 of them). I made whisky at George Washington's distillery. I filled damn near 1600 holes on leaking barrels created by leadcable borers. I maxed an Army APFT for the first time. I two-stepped with my 82 year old grandma who beat cancer. I was actually there for my child's first words. I read 20 books. I had legit hugs. I listened to TOOL with a whole new perspective. I helped an old man clear out his winery. I set myself on fire- be careful, distilling is dangerous. I watched the sun come up over the Chesapeake bay in Virginia.

But I went back on to active duty for the Army because I ran out of cash and didn't really want to bring in anyone else on the operation. Opening a business is tough. There is SO much that you don't know and won't know because hell, you've never done it before. 

I have a very "old school" mindset of doing business. If you can't pay for it, then don't do it. I didn't run a line of credit and didn't sell out and buy my inventory from MGP just so that I could provide an aged product without making it myself. Everything that WHITE MULE DISTILLERY has ever sold is what we made, aged, and bottled ourselves. 

If you don't take that first step though, there's a good chance that you'll never do it. That was my reasoning when I opened up. I'm actually a very logical, step-action oriented person. If I don't have a legitimate path for getting from point A to point B, I really am not interested. A craft distillery is different though; there is not a lot of guidance on how to do it and ZERO guarantees of success. However, the possible outcomes are tempting; wealth and an independent lifestyle are a legitimate possibility. The only drawback is the possibility of bankruptcy and failure. Yeah, bankruptcy.

So here I am. Packing my stuff and wondering if my youngest daughter will remember who I am when I get back home. I am thinking about how my eldest daughter will change over the next two years and what she will look like in 2020. I feel regret that I won't see the next four birthdays and relief that I will be able to fulfill my financial obligations. If you sign that bank loan, then you pay for it. I wish that our large US banks and corporations had the same values. 

In the end, don't feel bad for me or my family because I have zero regrets. I've had a lot of great experiences and truly lived a hell of a lot more than most people ever get the chance to. How many people do you know that were born without a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of? How many of those have shot machine guns, opened a distillery, stepped foot on over a dozen countries, and made chocolate chip waffles for their daughter? That list has gotta be short. Be patient and stay tuned. We are bringing you the best of the Ozarks.

Working with the Best

Over the last four days I feel like I've been given a "once in a lifetime" opportunity. I've been making whisky at the historic George Washington Distillery and Gristmill on the Mt. Vernon Estate. I basically stopped in for a tour and volunteered to help if they ever would like an extra hand. The manager agreed and two weeks later I'm splitting wood and tending the fire for their 18th century distilling operation. That of course was fun. The staff at the Army Logistics University was flexible and understanding of this volunteer opportunity so I've managed to spend four days with some of the best historians and distillers in the U.S. I just feel so blessed for the opportunity.

The W in whisky stands for wow or wonder

You never know where you will end up in this life. Four years ago I was deployed. Two years ago I was unemployed. Today I was making whisky at the George Washington Distillery in Mt. Vernon. Yesterday I was chewed out in an email. Today I was thanked in an email for making the best whisky anyone has ever tried. 

I started this blog to share the experience, but I've also found it to have a secondary function. That is journaling. It's pretty amazing to me to be able to catalog what I'm thinking at the moment. I don't really plan these posts out. That is why some are short and some are long and there is no set time limit between the posts. I was looking back on my Jan 29 post and reading what I wrote. January was a real hard month. I was sleeping in my car (whisky in the trunk) in Kansas City parking lots and knocking on doors to get sales in between making, bottling, labeling, and helping my wife with our newborn. It wasn't very glamorous but in hindsight, it made me hungry and it made me realize that I really need to be doing more than making a great product. I better be on the path to something that is substantial. Stay tuned.

What is THE next step?

Here is the nice part about still having a job while you are making whisky part time; you've got options. Truly, what needs to be done next is pretty straight forward: make it craftier. What that means for me is one of three things: start malting our own barley, making our own barrels, or put in a grist mill. Of course the most expensive is in reverse order. A grist mill will mean buying land and building a 200k + facility. A cooperage will cost about 40k and is pretty far outside of my current abilities. A malting facility is a little cheaper at 25k, but is even further outside of my expertise. However, this is one of the three things that I'll be doing next year. Yes. When I say I'm going to do something, you can pretty well bet your paycheck that it's going to happen. Comments? Probably not. I don't think I have a single subscriber to this blog and don't give a damn either. 

Revisiting craft

What is craft? What is artisanal? How important is "traditional" and what precisely does that mean in an ever evolving industry? For me it has come down to physical location and available resources. I don't make bourbon as I don't really think that I should even remotely be on the same level as Beam-Suntory, Sazerac, Heaven Hill, etc. I DO make whisky from local resources though. Yeah, I've sold some pretty young (one week to one year) old whisky but I haven't charged anything over 30 bucks either. I personally think it would be bullshit if anyone does if it isn't at least a year old. I use local grains. I use spring water from my own spring. We hickory smoke our grains, and make our own charcoal out of hickory. I'm a rural distillery and none of my neighbors grow organic, non-gmo grains. Maybe that sounds awesome on a label, but I'd rather patronize the farmers that I go to church with instead of having a cool logo on my bottle. I don't just make whisky either. We have all kinds of stuff sitting in bond: Apple Brandy, Strawberry Brandy (damn that one hurt the wallet), Straight Rye, Grape Brandy, and rum. The rum sure as hell wasn't made from locally made molasses, but the molasses was free if I could get it off of the truck. So far it's the only thing we have not made from Ozark grown produce. We have got about 8 barrel variations as well: recoopered, new white American oak, new toasted, 3x used wine, new uncharred, etc. Only time will tell which one will taste better and I'll wait as long as it damn well takes to find out. I still have a day job so that I can feed this obsession too. I wake up at 5am every morning, listen to the "snap crackle and pop" of tired joints, and put on the uniform of a U.S. Soldier. When I have a long weekend, vacation,  or a holiday, I go back home to my Ozark holler and make liquor. So tell me this: Is it craft? Is it artisanal? Better yet, call me one of these days, set up a time for a tour, and try it. Ultimately what I'm asking is this: Is it phenomenal? If not then let me know because my dedication is to making mind blowing great spirits and I don't care if it's done one cup or one thousand gallons at a time. What are your thoughts? I honestly don't think that this topic is really hit on enough. I think that if you are going to bring a product to market it should be to answer a problem. For me it's because of my deep love of the Ozarks. I wan't the end user experience the terrior of the Ozark region of America. I believe that it is underrepresented and should be a distinctive category in spirits. Let me be real clear. I love the Ozarks and think that we should stand out in the spirits category. I think that is something that we can all raise our glasses to.

Kiss my grist (mill)

I am fascinated with legacy technology that still works well. I am in Virginia for a few months and stopped by the Mt Vernon Estate just outside of D.C. It was phenomenal to say the least. One thing that really sticks out though is the distillery. Of course my interest would pull me there, but truly the best part of the distillery is hands down the grist mill. I can't describe with justice the attention to historical detail and craftsmanship of this mill, so please visit their website, visit them in person, and don't be a bitch. Pay the 100 bucks for the pint of whisky that they sell. you cannot get anything else like it anywhere else in the world. I'd pay 200 if that is what they charged. I digress...... The mill is powered by a two mile race from a pond. It seems to me that this is the next logical step for a lot of distilleries. Want to go green? Yep, no fossil fuels required to make your ground up corn. Also, look back in to the history of distilleries. They were always next to a good water source AND a grist mill. I think that if I'm able to this is something that I'd like to incorporate into our process. 

The Hard Right, Part Two of Three

As I mentioned in previous blog posts, young whisky sucks. Even if you start with a 159 proof, near grain neutral spirit, you'll find that with less than six months that it's harsh. Harsh is probably a kind word. I think one of my louder than life uncles used the term wildcat piss for young whisky (moonshine). Between a year and 2 years you have color, vanilla, oak, and hints of caramel, but that is just about where the complexity stops and branding begins. 

Let's take Ole Smoky Charred Moonshine, which is grain neutral spirit aged in oak barrels for 3-4 months. It's a heapin helpin of good ole fashioned Americana on the surface. Founded by college friends and situated at the foot of the Smoky Mountains in Gatlinburg Tennessee, it sounds like the American dream come true. The bottle (if a mason jar could be called such) just states that it is bottled by Ole Smoky. That means that the liquor could probably come from Indiana or nearby Kentucky. It tastes like oak and rubbing alcohol. Seriously. I don't think I would even disinfect an open wound with it. However, with a few million, you can manage to get national distribution, marketing, POS displays, and celebrity or big brand endorsements (a la Harley-Davidson).

Personally, it pisses me off. Not because of the success; not because they didn't live on hotdogs and ramen while they were crafting a superb spirit. I root for all things that Ole smoky says it is. What pisses me off was that they didn't take the hard right. They didn't put the quality first, They didn't hunt down the best local ingredients. They don't sell what they make. What I'm getting at here is that it has never been a quality centric product. Perhaps the ma and pa kettle packaging will pay off and they will keep making money hand over fist. It's hard to say. 

What this comes down to for me is that they didn't take the hard right and by God we will. I know that this sounds like a rant, and in a way it is. However, really I'm not complaining but instead just sharing my thought process of what I think a great brand should be doing. Really, I'm documenting this process of how Ozark Mountain Distilling is becoming one of the most valuable brands in the U.S. Yeah, I said it. Mark my words; we will be one of the most valuable brands in the U.S. I honestly don't know if we will be the most profitable, but by drawing this line in the sand I think we are doing what is right, what is ethical, and what will make the greatest product. Chances are, it's going to take years for this to happen. Look at Jim Beam, Jack Daniel's, Laphroaig,  etc. These companies grew organically, over time, and grew because they made a great product. I'm patient. I don't care if it takes me until I'm 80. I only care that it happens. Think these other "craft" guys are looking a quarter century down the road? Probably not. It's a hard right and we are taking it.